Do you ever miss the memories you had with someone, but not the person themselves? And thinking about it, I realize now that the memories I had with him were only allusions.

Hallucinations

I'm sorry if this ruins anyone's childhood. Alice in Wonderland is amazing, especially the Tim Burton one. Though Disney is a classic. So, really, either way works; Seeing What Alice Saw

if you ever remembered

sometimes thing are better left unsaid. sometimes the right things are the hardest, and they hurt the most, but in the end they're worth it.
if you're reading this- and you know who you are- you have to let me go. to you, i'm barely a face attached to a name that only you call me. i'm not as amazing as you think. you have your life and i have mine; it's only going to hurt us more if we pretend that our lives could intersect. we are parallel, and we probably always will be. i didn't know how to tell you this before, but you need to know that you deserve more than me. i'm an idea; words on a screen, but you barely know me and i barely know you. i wish this could have been different, but it isn't. please don't hold on to a false hope that this will change, because it won't. you don't need to be there for me, although i admire you for trying. thanks for the memories, but please create your own, without me. believe me when i say, you need to move on.

masks

Sometimes I like to wear a mask,
Put on a plastic face so no one can see.
They've fallen for the person I pretend to be.
Painted with a thousand colors,
I'm a work of art.
As far as they know.
Glued together by the idea of perfection,
I'm an idealistic mess of irony.
A smile pasted permanently over the pain.
To be honest, I'm not okay.

Running away from myself

Eventually, you have to realize that running can only lead you so far. No one gets to choose where they begin but that's what we're stuck with. We can't escape our histories, but we can let go of all the mysteries. When people see dandelions, "Some see a weed, some see a wish".  Are we seeking an escape; because escapes inevitably lead to more and more escapes, or are we pursuing freedom? Freedom is a release, but escape is a drug. Constantly inhaling to feel alive again. Yet, here's another struggle we have to escape from. Where do we end up? Where we started, if not farther down. Stop running, let go and allow yourself to be pursued. Really, this is more for me than you. But if this applies, think about it. Freedom beats escape any day.
Xoxo

To the one I've failed to protect

I miss the person you were.
I regret change not for my sake, but for yours.
I miss your kind smile,
and the innocence in your eyes.
We've both taken separate roads and although I swore to never lose you;
I see us now and I swear our friendship is falling through.
What is this you do to yourself?
Doubt, insecurity; hiding who you were like a doll on a shelf.
Is this some sort of game?
A ploy to gain some sort of fulfilling fame?
You are more than you think;
I believe in you, you are capable of more than they say and so much more than you believe.
Drop the label; you are made up of so much more than the reputation you aspire toward.

uncompromising conviction

I've been using people to make myself feel better. like look at me or love me so I feel good about myself. if you reject me I have to find some sort of way to fix it so I'm not left questioning my identity and my self worth. I've been so focused on making myself feel important that I've totally compromised my consideration of other people.. I've put security above kindness and I've put my own needs above the needs of others. I've placed my identity in the hands of those around me and I've allowed my emotions to follow the course of their actions. I've become apathetic to their needs and their emotions. how did this happen?